How to Write Like a Pundit

by chromatic

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  • Take a stand. Don't back down. It doesn't matter if you're right or wrong. People respect confidence. If necessary, repeat yourself until your message becomes conventional wisdom.

  • Use the royal "we". People like to be told what to do, and they will recognize your strong community ties.

  • Turn your experiences into absolutes. If you've seen something once, it must exist everywhere. If you've never seen it, it must not exist.

  • Argue that people will fail unless they do as you suggest. No one wants to fail, and everyone wants a strong leader. People are confused by choices, and will welcome your wisdom, confidence, and charisma.

  • Accept only complete agreement. Don't get caught up in the minutiae of debate. You look weak if you have to change your mind.

  • Point out the stupidity of the commons. Only a few people are lucky enough to be so much more intelligent than the average person. You have to praise yourself before these folks will recognize your superiority.

There are more rules, but if you stick to these, wise readers will recognize your rhetorical skills. Good luck.

Have you found any other useful rhetorical devices?